Releasing Guilt About Needing Help

Something that has come up quite a bit with my clients lately is feeling guilt or shame about needing help. I will jump into a tapping script that can help this issue in just a bit. But first, I’d like to say that admitting to yourself you need help takes a lot of courage! So if you feel like this, perhaps for just a minute you can appreciate yourself for having the courage to admitting you’d like some help.


Help wanted
Help wanted?

Many people struggle for years and never get the help they need. They may eventually become ill or have a breakdown of some sorts that “forces” them to get the help they need. There is so much pressure on us these days to be Superman or Wonderwoman! All the stress from our jobs, families, relationships etc. We live in a very fast paced society which is go, go all the time. Sometimes we need to take a step back, retreat from the world and look after ourselves.

Admitting you need help is not a weakness. It is a wonderful way of honouring your needs. We all deserve to feel healthy, happy and fulfilled. If something is not working for us we need to address it. Having someone who is not directly involved gives us wonderful insights and allows us to see things from a different perspective. We often can’t see the wood through the trees by ourselves.

So onto the tapping script. Write down your score on a scale of 0 – 10 first (where 10 is maximum guilt/shame).

Tap on the Karate Chop whilst repeating three times:

  • Even though I feel so ashamed that I need help and I can’t sort my own life out, I’m open to accepting myself anyway
  • Even though I should be able to handle this by myself and I feel so guilty that I can’t, I accept my feelings about this anyway
  • Even though I feel so much guilt and shame because I can’t cope with life and I need to get help off someone else, I’m willing to accept my feelings

Eyebrow: I should be able to handle this myself
Side of Eye: I feel ashamed I need help
Under Eye: I can’t cope with this by myself
Under Nose: I feel so guilty for needing this help
Chin: Everyone else seems to cope ok
Collarbone: Why can’t I cope?
Under Arm: I’m ashamed I can’t cope
Top of Head: I feel guilty because I can’t deal with this alone

Eyebrow: I wish I could cope with this alone
Side of Eye: Why do I need this help?
Under Eye: I feel at the end of my tether
Under Nose: I can’t cope on my own and I feel ashamed
Chin: It’s too much for me to deal with by myself
Collarbone: But I feel so much shame for needing this help
Under Arm: I hate feeling this shame and guilt
Top of Head: But I really do need help and can’t cope by myself

Eyebrow: I’m open to thinking about this differently
Side of Eye: What if felt ok about having this help
Under Eye: Maybe other people need help too
Under Nose: Maybe I don’t have to deal with this on my own
Chin: What if was ok to have this help
Collarbone: Maybe others are getting help but I don’t realise it
Under Arm: What if I enjoyed getting some help
Top of Head: I’m open to accepting this help and letting go of this shame and guilt

Use your words where appropriate to really tune in to how you feel. Keep tapping until you feel no more shame or guilt.

Think about times in the past, when you have wanted help and couldn’t get it or it wasn’t deemed acceptable for you to have help. Working on these specific memories can help heal your current beliefs.

Keep on tapping
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