Tag: family

Christmas Tapping

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Well Christmas 2013 is almost upon us! My log fire is burning, Christmas tunes are playing and I’m excited about catching up with my family and friends. I hope that you are feeling the joy too…if not then please take some time to tap. So many people forget that they have this amazing tool at their fingertips. So here are some reminders to help you stay calm this Christmas time:

  • Tap if you are still running around doing your Christmas shopping
  • Finger tap if you are stuck in a queue or suffering trolley rage in a supermarket
  • Tap if you can’t find the “right” presents
  • Tap when you are feeling stressed about getting everything done
  • Finger tap if you are stuck in traffic or can’t find a parking space
  • Tap on any money worries you have
  • Tap when you are feeling angry, frustrated etc with family not helping
  • Use tapping if you are getting stuck in the middle of family disputes or arguments
  • Tap if you feel overwhelmed

Remember you can finger tap discreetly practically anywhere, anytime. Take yourself off to the bathroom if it is all feeling too much and spend 5 minutes tapping until you feel calmer.

Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and happy, healthy New Year.

Christmas tree
Merry Christmas

If you would like a one to one session with me, please drop me a line. I offer sessions face to face or via Skype.

Keep tapping
Louise

We Need to Talk

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Have you ever found yourself feeling stuck and desperately wanting to be understood by your partner? Do you put off having “that talk” about your relationship, because you anticipate it will be difficult, uncomfortable or agonising!  Many of us don’t approach our partner because we think they will respond in a certain way. We anticipate their reaction, how they will feel and we think it’s just too difficult to deal with. So we don’t have that talk and bury our heads in the sand! Instead we go around seething, resenting, judging, getting angry, frustrated, sad and upset! Does that sound familiar?

EFT can’t change our partner but what it can help us with is our own judgements, thoughts, feelings and blockages that prevent us from approaching our partners and communicating with them in a calm way. It can also help us deal with the reaction we get if it’s not we want, expect or need.

Firstly try writing down exactly what it is you are feeling.  Then use what you have written down to come up with your tapping statements.  Below are some examples to help you get started:

  • Even though I keep putting off talking to my partner, I accept my feelings about this
  • Even though I can’t find the time to talk to my partner properly, I’m open to making the time
  • Even though talking about how I feel with {name} is so difficult, they just don’t understand me, I accept myself completely anyway
  • Even though {name} won’t understand what I’m trying to say, it’s just so difficult to talk with them, I deeply and completely love and accept myself anyway
  • Even though {name} will get upset when we have this talk, what if they surprised me and really listened to what I have to say
  • Even though I’m scared of hurting {name} with what I have to say, I’m open to remaining calm and getting my points across anyway
  • Even though {name} can’t handle it when I get upset, I really need to talk about this
  • Even though I don’t know how to explain  how I feel and what I need from {name}, I’m open to letting it be easier than I think it will be

Next, tap your way through your list until you feel a shift (check your scores are all down to zero before you stop). Then try practicing “your talk” with your partner in your mind. Visualise how you both react. If there is anything that doesn’t go as you planned it, then keep tapping on the different aspects until you feel comfortable.

Whilst we cannot control how our partners will actually react, we will succeed in communicating a whole lot better if we are calm and in control of our emotions. If the talk doesn’t go as planned, then do some more tapping to help you deal with the situation.

Good luck with “that talk”.

Keep tapping!
Louise
07866 013 637
louise@freeflowingenergy.co.uk

Who is Pushing Your Buttons?

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That’s an interesting phrase isn’t it? Pushing our buttons. It is usually our family, children, friends or colleagues that push our buttons. We’re closer to them, we care about them more. We care what they think and feel. We have feelings for them…and in turn they can cause a reaction in us that others just can’t. 

button © ioannis kounadeas http://www.fotolia.com/id/15998391

Well, let’s just stop there for a second. Who is driving our bus? We are. We’re in control remember? No-one can “make” us feel a certain way. It’s our choice how we feel and re-act. Yes really.

I know, I know, it’s hard to accept sometimes. But really, we do have a choice. We can say they did so and so and that made me feel …… (fill in the blanks). Well no, actually they didn’t. Yes they did do so and so. But that’s where it ends. The next bit is up to us. Deep down I think we really do know this but sometimes it is hard to accept.

So. Just stop. Take a nice deep breath. Think about what just happened. Now with full awareness, how do you want to react? Do you just want the button response, or do you want to take control? Walk away if you have to. Count to 10. Do some tapping. Do whatever it takes to choose your response. There, that’s better isn’t it?

Here’s a little script that might just help you react better to your buttons being pushed.

Setup: Tap on the Karate Chop whilst repeating three times:

  • Even though {insert name} really pushes my buttons, I accept myself anyway
  • Even though I hate just reacting to having my buttons pushed, I accept all of my feelings
  • Even though it feels like {insert name} makes me feel {insert feeling}, I accept all of me anyway

Eyebrow: I hate it when my buttons are pushed
Side of Eye: I hate just reacting to my family/friend etc
Under Eye: I wish I could stop and think about it first
Under Nose: {insert name} makes me feel {insert feeling}
Under Chin: I hate feeling this way
Collarbone: I don’t want my buttons pushed in this way
Under Arm: I hate reacting and not thinking
Top of Head: I wish I could step back and take control of my feelings

Eyebrow: Maybe I can just stop
Side of Eye: What if I could take a deep breath first
Under Eye: I could just walk away and think about it
Under Nose: I have to remember I’m in control
Under Chin: Nobody can make me feel a certain way
Collarbone: Maybe I can decide how to react
Under Arm: What if I tapped and thought about things calmly
Top of Head: Maybe I can stay calm and decide what to say slowly

I hope this helps you choose how to react, rather than just automatically reacting and doing or saying something you may later regret. EFT is a wonderful tool to help us deal with our emotions. So next time someone pushes your buttons, try tapping on how you feel first, before responding.

If you can come from a place of calm, life will be so much easier. I’m all for that.

Do You Follow the Herd?

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What I mean by this is do you find yourself being affected by other people?  It could be work colleagues – you know the ones, they always moan and whinge about everything. Or it could be your friend or family member who is always complaining and seeing the glass as half empty. It’s draining isn’t it?

If you are finding yourself getting dragged down with others, feeling stressed because everyone around you is stressed, then maybe it’s time to do something about it. I’ve read before that you should get different friends, hang around with different colleagues etc. Whilst that may be possible, often you actually do love your friends, you just wish they were a bit more positive! You obviously can’t change your family. So what to do?

The only thing you can do is change how you feel about it. Think about what it is that is bothering you and then do some tapping.   Below is an example script for if you are taking on other people’s stress. Use your words if they are more appropriate.

  • Even though I’m surrounded by stressed people and it’s making me feel stressed, I accept how I feel about this
  • Even though I’m taking on everyone else’s stress and it’s making me feel awful, I deeply and completely accept myself anyway
  • Even though I’ve taken on other people’s stress and now I’m stressed right out, I accept myself anyway

Eyebrow: I’m so stressed
Side of Eye: I’ve taken on other people’s stress
Under Eye: I wasn’t stressed until I hung around with {person}
Under Nose: I shouldn’t have taken on their stress
Under Chin: I hate feeling this stressed
Collarbone: I don’t normally get this stressed by myself
Under Arm: I don’t want to feel their stress and mine
Top of Head: I wish I could let this stress go

Eyebrow: I’m wish I hadn’t taken on this stress
Side of Eye: All this stress is not even mine
Under Eye: {person} is making me feel stressed
Under Nose: I should’ve stayed calm
Under Chin: I don’t want all this stress
Collarbone: Most of this stress isn’t even mine
Under Arm: I hate feeling all this stress
Top of Head: This stress is freaking me out

Eyebrow: Maybe I can take a step back
Side of Eye: What if I can relax and let this stress go
Under Eye: I don’t need to hold on to their stress
Under Nose: Maybe I can let this stress go
Under Chin: What if I can calm down
Collarbone: Letting this stress go with grace and ease
Under Arm: Maybe I can relax and just let it all go
Top of Head: Letting it be safe, easy and comfortable to let this stress go

Always remember to keep on tapping until you feel better. It’s best to rate your feeling score before you start and after you finish, so you know when you’re truly down to zero (and done).

Keep on tapping and enjoy feeling better.

My Gary Craig Article

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Do you have people in your life who are sceptical about EFT? Would you like your family or friends to be more open about EFT?  My article about my sceptical Dad was featured in Gary Craig’s EFT Insights Newsletter on September 18th. 

Featured Article #1: Louise’s sceptical dad warmed up to EFT:  Do you have a friend or relative that is sceptical about EFT? Read this article by Louise Woods from the UK and discover how she handled the problem. Please consult physicians on all medical issues.

I have been an EFT practitioner for about 3 years now. Previously I was a software engineer and had a successful career. After many years of stress and feeling there had to be more to life I took the plunge and started practising as a complementary therapist. I met a lot of resistance from my family when I changed careers. I think that they thought I had “lost the plot”!

Over the years they have come to accept that I’m not going to go back to doing a “normal” job. My Dad in particular has been quite sceptical about all that I do. In the last couple of years he has had angina and had to have an operation to fit a stent in one of his arteries.

Luckily this was successful and he has been feeling much better. He is however on both cholesterol and blood pressure tablets. I really thought that EFT could benefit my Dad and knew he was very sceptical and unlikely to try it.

A couple of months ago I thought I’d show my parents an EFT film and see what happened. After watching it, my Dad asked me “is there anyone in the UK who does this?”. Both my Mum and I commented that I do EFT and that he has clearly not taken notice of what I do! (I’ve since done some EFT on myself for the issues that raised!). I then spent some time showing him how to do EFT and suggested some tapping wording to get him started. These were along the lines of:

Even though I have this high blood pressure…
Even though my blood pressure is too high, I choose for it to return to a normal healthy level…
Even though I don’t like taking these blood pressure tablets…

I really didn’t think he would go through with and that he was just humouring me. But I thought at least I’ve tried.

I’m pleased to say that I was wrong. He started out tapping every day on his high blood pressure. My Mum commented that he seemed a bit less stressed. I then spoke to him a few weeks later and he reported that he was not tapping on his blood pressure anymore but that he was tapping on his temper! I was gobsmacked!

He has a very quick temper and really doesn’t handle stress well at all. I knew this was more like the core issue of his physical manifestations but wanted to tread carefully around his apologises. He has been tapping regularly since. The other day my Mum asked me what have I done to my Dad!

He is a now a lot calmer, his temper is much better and he even apologizes if he does lose it! If he starts losing his temper my Mum now says “tap, tap” and he does! His blood pressure has also come down. He has even started telling other people about EFT now. What a transformation! I’m going to encourage him to keep tapping on a regular basis and suggest he start looking at some childhood issues. I feel I have opened a door in my sceptical Dad. EFT is such an amazing tool, I love it. Thank you Gary, for sharing it with us.

In deepest gratitude,

Louise Woods

For more information please visit my website http://www.freeflowingenergy.co.uk/.